The Book

It’s here! The 80 and Sunny book. Makes a perfect gift for friends, family, bosses, newlyweds – whatever and whoever likes sunshine.

Click HERE for a preview.

Why you should get a copy (or ten):

• You support radical and neurotic projects about local weather.
• It is unique and your consumer choices define your personality.
• It is full of high-quality writing and photography from myself and several other Angelinos.
• You can be in my next book titled, "People Who Support Me.”

 

September 5, 2008: Mercy Rule

The gray clouds have been hovering over me for days now, a chilly reminder of the reality that I refuse to face: I'm in Michigan and not Southern California. The 80 and Sunny weather description challenge is suffering because I didn't let it go after a year like originally planned. What was once a die-hard display of writerly discipline is now just a testament to what a bad idea it is to hang on to something that has run its course.

So 80 and Sunny: 2007-2008 Edition is going to be archived here and on a special edition hard copy zine type thing that will be sent to all my guest writers and anyone that sends me an email complimenting my hair or my hard work.

I'm letting SoCal rest for the time being. I'll let Lynch do the LA weather reports. I'm starting fresh RIGHT NOW.

Labor Days Aug 30 - Sept 1 2008

When it's hot in Michigan, hot over eighty degrees, it is as comfortable as trying on wet jeans. People like to pretend it's beautiful out. My mom says to me "you couldn't ask for anything more, it's a beautiful day."

I guess it's just my LA nature but I could think of five quick jumping-off points that would have made the day better starting with a temp reduction of ten degrees and ending with an extended sunset.

August 28, 008

Soggy and seventy like the early entry wing of an old folks home. When the weather begins to remind you of the inside of the chuck taylors you've been wearing sans socks for eight years it really is time to evaluate your geographic placement.

August 27, 2008

If today was a celebrity it would have been Don Most.

August 26, 2008

Late summer sun in Michigan is like a candle centerpiece on a wooden picnic table. It's like a folk song. It's like the marriage of a snickerdoodle and oatmeal cookie. It's like a two-tone tan and cream El Dorado. It's like a bag of lays or a can of pringles or a bucket of popcorn or a bowl of pasta - whatever you can't get enough of.

August 25, 2008

It's fifty degrees here in mid-Mich, meaning that I'd have to actually double down on degrees to equal just one day in the Southwest. I'm made about having to wear a cardigan before labor day but I shouldn't judge. They like to keep things moist here in the mitten and there's only one way to do that: lay off the burner for a while.

August 24, 2008

Travis Bickle used to say that some day a great rain was going to come and wash away all the filth. Last night a great rain came in the mid Michigan country and washed away some pretty filthy heat.

August 23, 2008

Think of a greasy spoon diner on a Saturday morning, you are sitting by a window and the sun is heating up the side of your face, there’s a ceiling fan kind of close to your seat but the coffee you can’t help but drink is making your forehead sweat. The waitress brings your short stack and you douse it in syrup, you pick up your fork to take a bite and feel the stickiness on the handle of your fork. You mis-poured and now your hand is full of syrup and your forehead is sweaty and you still want pancakes and a napkin won’t do a thing but tear away and live forever in the stickiness. That is what humidity is. Say Yes! To Michigan.

August 22, 2008

The reverse hose-down: The more it rains here the hotter it gets.

August 20, 2008

Oh I heard it seven times today. "It's so nice out, get outside if you can!" Grocery store clerks, radio announcers, priests, parents, football coaches - all of them aware of the beauty of this rare day. Low seventies with an autumn-preview sun. It is more of a crime to stay inside on one of Michigan's 100 yearly sunny days than it is to throw a pop can in the garbage.

August 15-18, 2008

Here in the Great Lakes State you don't have to sweat in 80 degrees because the air does it for you.

Most people get really sweaty anyway.

August 14, 2008

Locusts and lightening bugs! The entire day went by with nary a cloud passing. I dare say it was actually 80 and Sunny in Michigan. The difference in aesthetic being in the clouds and the second growth trees. I wish we all wore shoes made of dehumidifiers.

August 13, 2008

Michigan weather is like a scoop of ice cream. It is never the same consistency twice and it makes you feel guilty if you don’t appreciate it. Wait, that is kind of like a mother. Michigan weather is like a mother. It is never the same consistency twice and will totally understand if you need your space. Wait, that is actually like a cat. Michigan weather is like a cat, it is never satisfied and only craps in the sand.

Ice cream, mothers, and cats: this weather report brought to you by the Chick Lit Association

August 8, 2008

I've crossed three time zones and several climates. I have yet to decide what will become of 80 and Sunny. Maybe it will be a cute nickname for all the lightning bugs outside across the field out here in the Michigan country. Maybe it will be a dream mantra, a sun dance chant. All that I know is that constant sunshiny weather will probably be rare come fall around here. I will have to start a new blog, "Windchill Factor" if I stay north.

Tonight is a chilly sixty and damp, damp like your legs in shorts against a vinyl booth seat that a waitress just cleared off with a wet rag.

End of July

Since 80 and Sunny accomplished the goal of creatively describing the weather everyday for a full year, I have been taking a break. A break to pack up my bags and find another weatherly place to report about. Check back soon for temp and atmosphere reports from the road.

For now, I am still in LA, and the weather is indeed, 80 and Sunny.

July 10, 2008

365 days of creatively, and oftentimes dully, describing the weather.

The things I learned:

1) It is actually only 80 and Sunny around here about 60% of the time.
2) My 2007-2008 weather season was relatively grey but quite often sunny.
3) Sometimes the weather calls for a metaphor, sometimes a simile, but never a knock-knock joke.
4) Metaphor days are beautiful, simile days can be difficult.
5) Smog is its own weather.

July 9, 2008

Oh the weather today. Some people call it overcast, some call it pollution, I call it little particles of industrial afterbirth. JG read in an article that Olympic marathon runners were training in baggy sweats and face masks to condition their bodies to the pollution in China. Our air quality today inspired me to send an open invitation to all Olympic athletes to come train in LA. It’s kind of like Bejing Light.

And a science note take-away for the eve of the 365th day of 80 and Sunny:The sky itself is not full of blue-tinted particles. Instead, light waves are deflected by air molecules, and repeated collisions scatter light in all directions.

July 8, 2008

So many food references come up when thinking about weather metaphors: lemonade, chili cheese Fritos, bacon, eggs, pudding - they all could describe the sun and air. I try to be more creative. I want to tell you how beautiful today was without using foodstuff in a simile but I don't know if it will work out. Today was sunny and pleasant like a spray of a citrus perfume named after a beach walk.

July 7, 2008

Shaking hands with the mid-eighties in a pottery kiln.

July 6, 2008

We are all cut potatoes in a sunshine oil deep fryer: A crispy eighty three and sunny today.

July 5, 2008

A real sizzler, without the buffet. No choices, just sun and a passing cloud if you really wanted it enough.

July 4, 2008

Hot as the inside of a human body. It was a day for napping and a night for explosives. Happy 4th of July.

July 2 & 3, 2008

In the summertime we can put Wednesday and Thursday together like a Saturday and Sunday. Both are days we don't want to work.

It's been hotter than reported as of late. The papers are saying eighty-somethings and our skin is feeling one hundred and ninety something. The factual journalistic truth and the sun are not agreeing and one of them is always right so keep wearing sunscreen.

July 1, 2008

How does one describe a sunny day? In comparison to the day before or the dark night or the long months of hard winter that preceded it? Should we describe it as it is, in the moment, regardless of what came before and what will come after? I’ll describe todays bright eighty-two sunny degrees like this: hot mustard over cold honey.

June 30, 2008

The brightness of the day can best be measured by how dangerous it is to be a pedestrian at dusk.

The longest day has past but we won't know the difference for a while. For now it seems like the sun is hanging out extra long. Not over-staying her welcome or anything, just letting us know it's high summertime.

June 29, 2008

Soft side of serious heat today. My block is the injection site of the sun. Side effects include sweating, squinting, and browning around the edges.

June 28, 2008

A day as perfect as yellow cake with chocolate frosting.

June 26 & 27, 2008

80 and Sunny has been tripped up from it's daily message in the past week plus. It never helps to place blame but it's always easy to blame the weather. Days were lumped in with other days, descriptions have been reduced to "ditto" It's a shame. Hopefully just a brief dark period in this season of summer light. A summer solsctice minireverse hybernation and a heat wave protest rolled into one.

We are back and ready to once again describe a sunny day.

June 23-25, 2008

I came back in with the cool breeze today. No traces of the hot weather my guest writers complained about, until I opened up the door to my place. It had been preheated to 101 degrees for the past ten days.